Continued from Page Five...
His Undying Faith to Her...
Back at the club, he'll dance stronger and more powerful than usual, fool around, flirt, and even take someone else to some cheap motel, knowing full well his "woman" is waiting for him at home. He calls it chivalrous. He calls it getting away with something. He calls it going to the forbidden, the exciting unknown, conquering adventure.... starting all over again.
....while she waits for him at home, with freshly cooked dinner.
Believe it or not, this really happens. I've seen and heard about it, time and time again. It's not uncommon to find these men have several lovers, and one who stays at home waiting for them. The only challenge is making sure all their lovers feel like a million dollars for the short time they're with them. Once their "new love affair" starts to get serious, and starts demanding more of their time, the truth about their "stay at home" woman or wife, and all their kids starts coming out.
By this time the "other woman" has two choices. She can either live with it, accept him the way he is (because she's blindly, madly in love with him by now), or dump him right there. 50% of women I've known accept it, and the other, more intelligent women will break off the relationship. For those that don't, the entire relationship becomes a game. "Their little game" of lies trying to keep their relationship a secret to everyone, and especially from his wife or significant other at home.
Usually women like this have very little self-esteem to begin with. They are co-dependents who can only feel complete with a man that treats them so well, and so domineering at the same time. They like the fact that he tells her what to do, where to go, how to dress, and how to act. His jealousy turns her on, as she swears she would never cheat on him, lie to him, etc, etc, while all the while they both know perfectly well they're mutually cheating on his wife, or significant other at home. He tells his lover that he's broken up with his girlfriend, or in the process of a divorce, or that all she is, is a live-in room mate, just "friends", etc, etc... lies, lies, and more lies.
His Secret?
His confidence, and the way he talks to women. He's a good talker - could sell an Eskimo an ice cube. These guys make excellent car salesmen. He tells her how beautiful she is. He tells her this all the time. She melts in his arms, and would rather live a fantasy of lies than face the bitter reality that underlies everything and is to come. She's in love with his love for her. She's in love with his confidence. He now starts to become a little boy to her. His playfulness and boyishness brings her joy. She embraces him like a mother to a son. She now feels responsible for him in some strange way. She takes him in like family. Now she can’t imagine life without him.
Little does she realize that his confidence and playfulness is his game. His confidence comes from the permanent woman he has at home, or a mother he can always go back to. He knows he can always go back to her at any time. He fears nothing. If he loses his lover, he's got his faithful at home, waiting, with his next meal ready to go, just as his mother prepared it for him. This is the boy. This is the man. Will he change? No, never. Once they know they can get away with this, it becomes a turn on to them.... a challenge of juggling all these women at one time.
These men can drive any woman to tears, drama, and absolute insanity. They start thinking, "What I wouldn't do for his love..." Nothing. They find themselves doing the insane, the impossible, the craziest things that would probably make a good novel some day. But they dare not speak it, nor write about it, for the shame they would face and would have to bear.
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