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I was dancing the most wonderful soothing song the other day while in Tel Aviv, Israel, when my partner said to me, "Edie, I feel bad that I don’t know that many turns. This is all I know. I’m sorry. "
Now THAT broke my heart. Guys, it doesn’t matter if "that’s all you know." BIG DEAL. Who cares? Just enjoying the music together, and being able to hold the rhythm, dancing in someone’s arms is enough. Enjoying the music, softly dancing, no pressure to do a million spins…. THAT’S LIVING IN THE MOMENT!!! We all need to learn If that’s all you can do, then enjoy doing what you can do, and stop putting so much pressure on yourself. Guys, believe it or not, when you put pressure on yourself, you STRESS THE WOMAN OUT AS WELL. There’s something about touching someone during dancing, that makes the two people almost be able read each other’s thoughts. Ever found that to be true? There are also times when I’m dancing with a guy, and I can actually feel him trembling from fear. Now THAT BREAKS MY HEART even more! I usually tell them, "RELAX DAMN IT!!" LIGHTEN UP ON YOURSELF! It’s just "me" for crying out loud! "Yes, but Edie, that's just the point... I get nervous…"
Oh brother. Guys, listen. You don’t have to PERFORM for your partner all the time. This is not sex. Close. But not sex. If you ask me, thinking you don’t have enough turns is WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE to put on yourself for the evening. Relax! Women are not as critical as you think. Trust me. Most (not all), are very forgiving, and encouraging (listening ladies? Hm?) and will support you through your journey to the upper echelons of the local Salsa community. The good ones will. The others, well, remember, in the end, what goes around, comes around. So don’t worry about all these moves, turns, and turn patterns. They will come over time. Perfect what you have now. Execute your moves WELL. If you learn too many turn patterns, too quickly, you will never build a solid foundation, and will not be very much fun to dance with. In fact, some men (beginner/intermediates) try to put women into so many moves during one song, and all of them very poorly executed. When that happens, women can’t wait till the song is over SO WE CAN RELAX and DE-STRESS from the overwhelming number of experiments he just put us through. |
